I Had a Feeling

”I Had A Feeling”
by Dr. Dennis Ginoza October 6, 2009

I have returned to an old stomping grounds, the state of Iowa. It is here where I went to school at William Penn University. Those four years gave me new experiences, interesting encounters with people from the Mid-West but also from the world, and helped me establish some roots in friendship. Foremost, it gave me a college education and the grounding to another phase in life.

In the course of the years, the roots have broadened and deepened. Today they are living relationships, some old ties, some faded ties, and they are cherished memories. Whatever their form, they are a part of me, some times like an old well that nourished me, sometimes they are a living well with fresh and new flowing water.

It is in returning to this Iowa soil, I have become more aware of these broadened and deepened roots. As memories, they cannot be forgotten. As new encounters, they are enriching and surprising.

The present tie is now with family for my wife is a girl who grew up on a farm in north central Iowa. This is now part of the living and growing roots. She has two sisters in Iowa with growing families.

As my wife and I began this trip, first a stay in Colorado, then stops in Kansas and Missouri, I had a feeling. I wanted to return to William Penn University in Oskaloosa, where, as a young boy from Maui, Hawaii, for more reasons than one, doors were opened for me.

Those years were formative years, a place where I felt I belonged, and a people I came to love. From here there were new ties made and job experiences that not only sustained me financially, but enriched me. I developed ties with people not only in Iowa, but in Ohio, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Illinois, and Indiana. Some of these ties are today, living ties. The small college community became for me, a large family, better expressed, a collection of families.

They say, you cannot return to an old home. That is true, but only to a degree. Yes you can, but realize that things will not be the same. How can they be? The winds of change are constant and holds time for no one. If they do hold, they do so only as memories, tales, and legends. Yet, in a new form they have a reality.

In those early steps were intertwining threads of what I brought with me and new threads that created a kind of life tapestry. One of those was clearly my interest in and desire to learn especially in faith. Faith is commonly referred to as a pursuit of religion or understanding or meaning and God.

Other threads included interest in sports, especially baseball, in leadership and organization, travels to explore the world, simply to get to know people, different job experiences, and the pursuit of learning.

So I had a feeling. I called the president’s office of William Penn just to say hello. President Ann Fields’ door was open and we visited for 40 minutes: Penn Hall looked the same as I walked them over 40 years ago, but it was not the same campus. To answer more of the my questions, the president called in Marsha who had been at Penn for 29 years. Marsha gave us a tour of the new facilities—a new sports center called Physical Activities Center, impressive, modern, and envious; a new high tech building that takes communication and net working into the waiting decades. I was impressed. Old ties fade and get renewed.

I had a feeling. Now I wanted to visit the First Christian Church where I served as the youth director. No, it wasn’t the same. The external white bricks were gone. The wear of time called for a major renovation. But there were old voices never to be forgotten. The youth director and secretary were as cordial as I remembered people to be. I walked down the stairs to see some men playing dominoes. Surprise. A dad of a set of twins I worked with was there. Hello Walter. Then one man said, I married Carol, one of the twins. Another man said, “And I married Karen, the other twin.” De ja vu! Then I learned Linda and Jerry returned to Oskaloosa. That night I got an email from Linda: “Can we get together?” We were college friends. She now had her Ph.D.

It was at this church, one Sunday as Rev. Goins was preaching, I wondered and asked myself: “Will I ever preach like that someday?” It didn’t occur to me at that moment that one day, this church experience was helping me form my future as an ordained pastor. It has become clear to me that the hallways we walk one day will lead to our future.

Some time ago I read where Carl Jung had used the word, convergence. It refers to how some people happen to come together at a particular time and a particular place. I find that this is true with all of us. It is meant to work for a higher purpose: that is my belief. Or, it might for some, just be a missed opportunity.

The voices of the past can prompt us to do something at the very moment. That something is in our thought, it’s in the back of our mind, then one word pushes us to bring it to life. As I was on the phone with another Penn college friend, Diane, she asked me, “Are you writing more in your blog?” Oh! And here I am. So this article.

I had a feeling. The other day I went for a walk across the street. I wanted some fresh air and a little exercise. I jogged a bit. As I was walking, I wondered, “What will I encounter today?” Yes, I had a feeling. I walked into the store to just look around.

I came across a rack with movies for sale. It said, “Buy One, Get One Free.” I perused the collection. A baseball movie caught my eye. I pulled it off the rack and it said, “Amazing True Story.” I read on, it’s a story about Norway, Iowa, a small town high school team that has won 19 state championships. The coach, Jim Van Scoyoc led this team to this incredible height. Then he was fired. Will the new 24 year old assistant coach take this team to its 20th state championship? I caught my breath. Jim Van Scoyoc
was a classmate of mine at William Penn. Wow! And I remembered, our baseball coach wanted me to play on that college team, but I decided, I needed to put my efforts in my study. You don’t know how hard that was. I must have played softball with Van Scoyoc in PE; I’m just guessing. Now he is a legendary coach. I bought the movie for $9.99.

Some things in our lives leave us forever and we can never get them back. But some things will always be a part of us. They are our roots. Our roots became like threads that shape our lives. Feelings traverse time, passing generations, and old encounters, and in a strange way, they remain as part of us. In this short segment of time, it has brought me to reflect, to cherish, and to recollect not only where I’ve been, but who I am and where I am today.

I had a feeling. Feelings are a link to yesterday, but also with what one may encounter in the next moment.